Here’s to my 30s

Today is the last day of my 30s.

An interesting time really. It’s been a quarter of my life so far, and about half of my life as an adult, give or take.

What can I say, you’re no longer so wide eyed that everything is new, be it shiny and new or terrifying or overstimulating. But you’re (hopefully) not so jaded that you’ve seen everything, or feel like you have. A lot happens in a decade, a lot changes but a lot stays the same too. I started it off with a bang moving to Berlin, where I still live. And that same year my dad died.

In the last ten years I experienced truly falling in love, and feeling what it is to live in that space. I experienced heart break, and living with that. I landed a dream job, and said good bye to the company when it closed its doors forever. Most of my books were published in my 30s including some of my proudest work.

Poetry Club started when I was 30, and is still going.

I made some mistakes that led to successes. I got somethings right that lead to great personal pain. I got fit, I grew a beard, I went to hospital for a truly stupid reason. I had a heart attack that probably saved my life in the long run.  I met awesome people and made awesome friends. The opposite of that happened too.

Ups and downs, the fun kind and the not fun kind. It’s been a hard decade. A lot of work for not as much reward as I’d hoped for, or maybe just not in the way I’d hoped for. I do what I can to appreciate what I have achieved despite the other stuff.

And tomorrow will be Wednesday. But it will also be the day that I turn 40. I don’t think life starts at 40, I think life starts when you start. And although it has felt like I’m running in place sometimes, the truth is, the truth is sometimes the world moves and sometimes you move. And when you’re both moving at the same speed it just looks like you’re standing still, but no one ever actually is. I’ve said before candles burn brighter when you put the flames together and I try to hold onto that idea.

That to make the world brighter we need to put our flames together, encourage each other, help each other. Don’t blow out someone else’s flame just to be the only light in the room. That doesn’t make your flame brighter, it just makes the room darker.

So, here’s to turning 40. The ball is rolling and I plan to keep it rolling until I get to the top or the side or round the bend. Where ever this rolling ball we live on takes me, that’s where I’m going.

I wouldn’t say no to a million book sales though. I can be introspective while also succeeding. Just saying. 😊

And here’s to my 30s. What a fucking day that was, now onto the next one. Cheers.