Superstitions By D.I. Jolly
“I know what superstitions are, but what are normal stitions?”
Josh stopped dead in his tracks and turned to look at his long-time friend.
“No, no… We’re not doing this again.”
“Because like, the super ones are breaking mirrors and black cats and walking under ladders, and stuff like that. Those ones curse you for years, but like, what’s just a normal stition?”
He looked up at Josh who felt on the verge of tears.
“How? How can you continue to be like this? How have you managed to survive this long not knowing how the world, or how words work?”
“Oh don’t be such a dick! It’s a valid idle thought, indulge me! What is a normal stition?”
Josh took a few deep breaths, a sip of his coffee, then sat down at the kitchen table to think.
“Ok, what about that cheersing thing? That if you don’t look into someone’s eyes you get seven years bad sex. It’s not no sex, just bad sex. That could be a stition.”
Johnny’s face lit up.
“Yeah, now you’re getting it. And what about when you drop your phone, the screen isn’t broken until you actually looked at it. Schrödinger’s iPhone. That can be a stition too.”
Josh couldn’t help but chuckle, and he thought for a moment that he was often too hard on his friend.
“Ok, one more then I’ve got to go to work.”
They sat in silence for a few minutes determined to find one more stition, until Johnny said.
“You know when you can’t sleep in your own bed, so you get up and go and sleep on like, the couch? Then you instantly just fall asleep. That can also be a stition.”
Josh nodded his head thoughtfully.
“Yeah, it’s not the person, it’s the bed. I like it.”
“Awesome, well, have fun at work.”
Josh made a face in reply, then got up and headed out for the day, wondering what other stitions he could come up with for them to talk about when he got home.